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PostPosted: Sat Jan 07, 2006 7:34 pm    Post subject: Carefull With Children...
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A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it

was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even

though it was a very large mammal, its throat was very small. The little

girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher

reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically

impossible. The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".

The teacher asked what if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied,
Then you ask him".


A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while

they drew. She would occasionally walk around to see! each child's work.

As she got to one little girl who as working diligently, she asked what the

drawing was. The girl replied, "I'm drawing God." The teacher paused and

said, "But no one knows what God looks like." Without missing a beat, or

looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."


One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at

the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother has several

strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. She

looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, "Why are some of your

hairs white, Mom?" Her mother replied, "Well, every time that you do

something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns

white." The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then

said, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hairs ! are white?"


The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to

persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how

nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's

Jennifer; she's a lawyer,' or That's Michael. He's a doctor.'" A small voice

at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher. She's dead."


A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to

make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the

blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."

"Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in

the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?" A little fellow

shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."


The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school

for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun

made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is

watching." Moving further along the lunch line,at the other end of the table

was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies. A child had written a

note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.


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No new posts Good Jokes - Children these days........ vidyasaraswathi General Talk & Fun Stuff 1 Fri May 20, 2005 2:12 pm

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