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priya
Moderator
Joined: 24 Jul 2003
Posts: 626
Location: Bangalore
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Hi All,
This is again Priya... Trying to post some more...Please tell your comments.....
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1. Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end
& a fool at the other.
2. Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationals
are more popular than a five day test.
3. Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor
degree and a woman gains her master
4. Divorce : Future tense of marriage
5. Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the
lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds
of either".
6. Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number
present.
7. Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody
believes he got the biggest piece.
8. Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated
by feminine water-power ..
9. Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage.
10. Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens &
everybody disagrees later on.
11. Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.
12. Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
13. Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
14. Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their
mouth.
15. Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you
actually do.
16. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to
decide that nothing can be done together.
17. Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.
18. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
19. Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken
of when dead.
20. Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that
you actually look forward to the trip.
21. Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally
falls into a river.
22. Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in
midway "See I am not injured yet."
23. Pessimist : A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO,
Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
24. Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
25. Father : A banker provided by nature.
26. Criminal : A guy no different from the rest... except that he got
caught.
27. Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you
are early.
28. Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your
Confidence after.
29. Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with
his bills.
And the Last But not the least is...
30. Mainframe Engineer : One who gets paid for surfing the net and reading my post |
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References
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 Posted: Mon Mar 01, 2004 12:01 am Post subject: Re: Cool Meanings for some Classic Definitions (Joke) |
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krishna dilip
New User
Joined: 25 Feb 2004
Posts: 1
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 hai priya. nice jokes. send more  |
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harikrishnanrajeev
EXPERT
Joined: 28 Jan 2004
Posts: 40
Location: Trivandrum
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priya : Someone who has no other work except posting jokes in forums.
PS: I enjoy some of those anyway... |
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coolbuddy
New User
Joined: 04 May 2004
Posts: 1
Location: Chennai
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| Really a cool one. |
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